Saturday, June 14, 2008

Feelings

I'm sorry that I've changed to some of you.

My smiles went lesser.
My humorous level decreased.
I'm sorry that I've been ignoring most of you.


I really want to talk about it with you guys, but no, is just not the one. Even if i talked, i ended up with a very irritating replies like : oh, swt!, haha, so? etc. Yes, apparently i hate those kind of replies. Oh yea sure, that sure made me feel better.

I choose some people to talk to, and they just gave me those kind of change-the-subject-very-fast reaction. That ain't helping at all. Is not helping me to reduce my depression.

Stop forcing me to smile. I really hate it. When I'm not in the mood, please, just don't give a damn about me and leave me alone. Don't freaking force me. You know what I'm going through, and you still make me force a smile which didn't help a single bit. I know smiles make most things straight but it doesn't stop the misery in the heart sometimes.

As i said before in my personal message, "1 single sentence can brighten up my day.". It sure could, if is from the special one. But the special one seldom talk to me, which makes my day down most of the time.

Friends doesn't helps all the time. No, not all of them. The so called Ji Muis or Babes. Not all of them help, that's why I don't lay trust on some of them. Some of them, wasn't even there for me, they just walks away after listening just the TITLE of the problem. They didn't even bother to listen the story line, or even just the synopsis of it.

All i want, is just to say, could you just talk to me? Just to brighten up my day? I really felt so happy, and glad that you would still look for me.
But apparently you didnt...

"Everyone says time is a healer when at the same time they also say absence makes the heart grow fonder."
This sure makes sense, I sure felt that way too. Which makes me felt worst than before, this is stupid...

~Karumenu